Friday, January 6, 2012

You Must Tell Me Everything Or Else

A little bit of blogging reality. It's not all sunshine and roses and Nespressos behind the scenes folks.
Sometimes it sucks!

I share little bits of my life with you each day. I tell you about things that make my heart stop, things that inspire me, things about my business and my love of beautiful homes. I have also had some heartbreak in my life and my life has changed considerably over the time I have kept this blog. Who's life hasn't? I happen to think my life is great. I try to look at everything with a positive outlook and live 'as if'. I don't think that I am fake or not who I am on this blog. This blog is me. Really.

Why do I say all this? ....

...anonymous, misinformed, slanderous commenters who visit me from time to time. I ignore them mostly....'starve them of oxygen'.... as recommended by my blog friends who have also been on the receiving end of these cowardly anonymous attacks.

The reason I am even bringing this is up is I have been questioning... where do you draw the line?... ...between sharing interesting aspects of your life and intimately private parts of your life that you reserve for immediate family and your closest friends.

My 'nasties' actually demand of me that I spill the beans about my marriage, why I sold 'the house', why I am moving and seem to be demanding a truth that isn't there. It's not really that interesting. Things have happened... but that's life (my life) and it's not magazine worthy gossip. There is no conspiracy. What you see is what you get.

It's hard not to get defensive. I know I don't have to answer to anyone. I know that. But this stuff hurts my heart. It really does.....

....so..... I have not taken up with homeless men 'to make myself feel better'!!!!!..... I just happen to like people and feel compassion for others who struggle, I respect my boy's father and respect his privacy.... and my house was a great success on all fronts and has inspired me to do it all again in spite of aggressive, misguided comments asserting the contrary.

So what more do these people want from me? This is me. This is who I am. Why do I have to give them more? It puzzles me why some feel it necessary to demand the most intimate details of my life while making the most dogmatic, incorrect accusations against me and my family.... as if they know a truth that I don't.

Where do I go from here? How about we do a deal, anonymous commenters? You tell me your financial position, your intimate family details, all about your marriage and why you do everything you do..... hang on, cancel that, how about we just start with you telling me who YOU are?

Sunshine and roses will continue tomorrow.
Sweet dreams lovelies.
Photobucket

84 comments:

  1. I am so sorry you have been on the receiving end of mean comments A-M. I can't understand why people feel the need to be nasty to others, I really think their own life must be pretty sh@#y & they want others to feel the same way! I have a good quote for them " In judging others we do not define them we define ourselves". I for one enjoy your blog.

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  2. It is your blog A-M. What you choose to reveal is up to you. If people don't like it they can always stop reading. I, for one, respect you for keeping some things private and showing respect to others involved.

    Someone once told me that reading a blog is a bit like being asked into someone's lounge room. Conversation should be polite and if information is not given then it is rude to ask.

    I wish you and your lovely sons all the best. The anonymous commenters need to get out more.

    Take care.

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  3. I agree, it's your blog and therefore you can blog about whatever you want, leave out the bits you want, include the bits you want. Simple.
    My tradie partner would tell this anonymous commenter to "go root their boot". Good advice me thinks :)
    Take care x

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  4. I can't believe you had to write this, it's not right that
    You have been made to feel pressured into discussing
    things you don't want to, you share what you want to, and
    for me that is enough. I love your blog and it is one of the first I followed and always enjoy. You seem like a lovely person, very kind. Don't let nasty comments upset you, people are not entitled to details about your life just because they read your blog - they are just privileged to read what you have been kind and brave enough to share, thank you for doing it so well x

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  5. AM, dont you waste any time losing sleep over any of this..you know who you are..and YOU and only YOU has the right to decide who, what and when you want to share intimate details about the goings on in your life.

    Just continue to do ..what you have been doing..and that is..just ignore it..dont even torture yourself by reading the next paragraph of any of these insensitive and bullying emails..just do yourself the favour and hit the DELETE button.

    I seriously cannot believe that these anonymous followers actually take time out of their day to write such hurtful and insensitve emails..and you couldnt have ended this post any better ...although..I was thinking more along the lines of ...WHO the bloody hell do you think you are? rather than..who YOU are? lol

    Big hugs lovely...you know we love you ..just as you are x

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  6. A-M these people that leave anonymous comments really have nothing better to do with their lives so therefore they seek enjoyment wanting to know the ins and out of yours. I agree that some things need to be kept private and what you chose to share is totally your call. Enjoy your weekend and take care. Sandy xx

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  7. HAha Love that SarahB. Sadly that just tends to feed venomous annon posters. Starving them of a response or reaction truely is the quickest way.

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  8. I couldn't read this and not comment.

    You seem like such a lovely, open-hearted person and I can't imagine why anyone would say such awful things about you. It's not difficult to read between the lines and surmise that pain has to come with your divorce, but you're obviously making the most of life, which is such a rare and admirable thing to do. Nobody is entitled to know the finer details.

    I can't believe that people would be so awful.

    I love your blog and hope you're not affected too much by the anonymous keyboard warriors.

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  9. A-M, I for one love reading your blog..found this and thought of you...
    Being yourself is an aspect of our lives that is never easy to do at every instance. Sometimes being yourself may be a huge inconvenience, as doing what everyone else accepts may seem to be the path of least resistance. Remember that being yourself is important because it not only builds your character and your strength, but also takes a lot of courage to execute day in and day out. Being yourself makes a person stand out in this world full of people who are only followers, and makes a person a pioneer and a leader. Though some may look down on someone who is completely being them self, one must recognize that living a life being his or herself is a life that will be full of fulfillment and satisfaction knowing that the way one lived was not because of what anyone else but their self would be satisfied with living.
    Take care X

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  10. Dear AM

    I have been a regular reader of your blog and have always enjoyed your honesty about the fact that not everything is perfect. I love the fact that you also celebrate and embrace the good things in your life. We are lucky, we live in a wonderful country with access to good health, education and living standards. Your life is your own, share what you want. Life is full of peoople who are not brave enought to do what you do.
    "I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next" (Gilda Radner)

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  11. Beautifully written sweets. From the heart.

    Enough is Enough
    xxxx

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  12. Hi A-M,

    I guess I'm a lurker because I very rarely comment. I want to this time though, because I have a message for cowardly anonymous idiots who comment:

    GET A LIFE!!! Stop hiding behind your computer screen and being so damned petty and nasty. Gossip mongers is the term I'd use for losers like yourselves.

    Sorry A-M, this type of thing just shites me big time. This is your blog and you will post absolutely anything you so choose on it. If people don't like it, too bad. None of us have knives held to our throats while we read.

    I know you've had heartbreak. I know you've picked yourself up and moved on. You're a wonderful mum, a wonderful role model for that gorgeous boys and you're a kind and compassionate person. You fake? Puhlease!

    Ignore those oxygen thieves A-M. Keep starving the bastards til they cark it.

    Julie xxx

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  13. Hi AM What a wonderful post given the circumstances. We all here love what you do and wait eagerly for your new posts each day. We don't expect any intimate details about your life - you choose to reveal what you wish. I guess don't take the negative bloggers personally as it seem that any one who blogs gets these disgusting people trolling their blogs and leaving uninformed comments. I eagerly await tomorrows post and can't wait for you to build again and to read all the posts that comes with it. I had a laugh to myself the other day wondering if you would hire the window man or was it the stairs man from the other house!!!!. Love your work AM. Love Nataliexx

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  14. I'm with HausStylish and absolutely appalled that you've had to write a post in this vein. Your business is no-one else's and they have no rights to ask, cajole, demand anything more of you than what you give.

    Deep breaths, A-M!

    Jennifer xx

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  15. Sarah, you made me laugh with your partner's comment of " go root their boot". Nataliexx

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  16. Hi AM
    I am a lurker (sorry!) but regular reader. Your blog is beautiful- I really respect that even in hard times you choose to see the beauty in life. I love seeing what the boys get up to and your pride in them shines through- for good reason, they are lovely! FWIW I think you should write what you want- it's your blog and there's a little red cross to click on for those that don't like it. There are plenty of us that do like it! Keep on shining your light.

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  17. Anyone that knows you and has met you knows who you are. You aren't fake in any way and are just so warm and caring.
    Honestly (and you have to read this exactly how it's written - put your best Shazza accent on) - FAAAARK EMMMM.
    xxx

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  18. They are called Trolls for a bloody good reason, 'cos that's exactly what they are! I've had some rippers at The Hedge, with one regular moron swearing black & blue that I've lied since Day 1 & that we haven't done any of the renovation ourselves, a Builder as done it all & all of my photos have been Photoshopped to look like we did it! Hit the Remove Comment every time - you have the power each & every time to do this & just look at your Followers & stats. You are a shining star in the bloggie firmament A-M that's why you have fans around the globe. Off to extra stick pins in my Troll Doll for you sweetie.
    Millie xx

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  19. Good grief, not again! What is with these people!?

    I suggest that whoever this person/people is/are, that if they want drama and nitty gritty details, maybe turn on the TV and get your gratuitous gossip there. Try the Kardashian show, it seems it would suit your style.

    Kathryn xx

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  20. oh AM, please don't feel the need to write these kind of posts, I assumed you had the spam thingy on so you could weed them out. I don't even have that, but remember, my blog doesn't devolve anything about me, so no one knows really who I am or where I live etc etc. It's not that i'm frightened, it's just a choice. But as a result I don't bond with my followers like you do, I never will. I wish I could without the loss privacy of privacy tho. You are the only blogger that I kinda feel I know, even tho, we both know, I don't cept for your blog.

    here's the thing, I am certain this "anon" person does know you. The comments seem personal. Ergo, keep deleting them, don't give them the time of day on your blog, we sure as hell don't want to hear anything they've got to say. The fact they go on about your ex etc, this makes me think he is somehow involved, perhaps unknowingly. (it would explain why they mention your kids being disadvantaged - jealousy)

    xxxxxx
    Annie

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  21. There are always going to be nasty, small minded kids in the playground.
    Luckily, good friends and kind hearted strangers will always outnumber them and hopefully help ease the sting of sharp tongues.

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  22. I agree with Annie before me. If someone seriously suggested that you were taking up with a homeless man, it makes me think that person does actually know you and is really trying to hurt you. Can you report it to your internet provider and have them trace the IP address? Personally I would not bring it up again, but then I know you do wear your heart on your sleeve.

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  23. You are really very brave to write this post and I think you should be very proud of yourself.

    This week I have returned to blogging and facebook. I started blogging in 2006. Crikey, that was a long time ago. I had a few breaks here and there but in 2011, I had a year off. I needed it. The lines became really blurred. What do I tell? What don't I tell? Do I really have the right to blurt everything out about my kids lives or one day are they really going to not like me very much for it? And yes, the comments. The weird, freak me out ones. And the down right nasty ones. To be honest, I found facebook even worse.

    So now I have the lines clearly defined. Business and business related stuff only.

    Good luck. I love reading your posts. I love your beautiful things. Don't let the turkey's get you down x

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  24. Dear AM, People confuse bloggers with celebrities, and can obsess about every aspect of their lives in a similar way. It is sad and regrettable and possibly a symptom of seriously large holes missing in their own lives.

    Look at all the lurkers (myself included lol!) that have come out in your defense over this post. You are great, and you are extremely dignified and positive about whatever your personal circumstances are now, and have been in the past.

    Forget them. Keep being you. We love that person.

    Lisa x

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  25. A-M you have handled yourself in a dignified way which is more than I can say about your anonymous commentators. They are pathetic cowards who are only brave when they can hide behind a computer screen. I love hearing about your gorgeous boys, I love seeing your world through your eyes, I have wept tears at your encounters with Bill (which, incidentally, do NOT come across as you trying to make yourself feel better). You are an angel A-M, I have always said it. God bless xxxxxx

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  26. I truly love this country... But why do some of us choose to pull each other down... Or is it a female thing? Not sure. But delete it A- M, from your thoughts and inbox. Don't waste a single moment or any energy on it. You are a beautiful soul xx

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  27. Dear darling A-M, I was so very sorry to read this truly awful post. I have been on the end of some gaspingly vitriolic comments in my years as a columnist and an author, and that's perhaps why I don't write anything too personal anymore. (Some of the comments appeared on Amazon and seriously hurt my book sales - and made me want to retire from writing.)
    The thing is, these people usually lead very sad, very unfulfilling lies and that's why they feel compelled to criticise others. They are the ones with the problems. You only need to read their copy to realise they are actually quite damaged. And her lines are littered with typos, so she can't be that intelligent! ("Eeek a bit bogan..." Who WRITES like that?) It does sound as though she has an issue with you, and I suspect the issue is that she is envious. To which I say: "Living well is the best revenge". Go out and live your fabulous life! We will be there with you, enthralled as always. Don't respond to her crazy, inarticulate comments. Don't rise to the bait. See her for the insecure little idiot she is.
    Sending you hugs of support from Melbourne. (PS I'd LOVE to live your life!)
    Janelle McCulloch

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  28. Oh dear A-M, it's true jealously is a curse!! and that's what those miserable people are just jealous so take no notice wipe them out and keep entertaining those of us who love reading what you want to share with us and enjoy growing with you and your boys and appreciate your kind comments back when we need them
    Have a lovely weekend xx

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  29. That's ridiculous. I admit, I have wondered what happened, but I know it's none of my business. Curiosity is natural, but it does NOT give people a right to ask you for details (especially not rudely). You were obviously in a lot of pain for a while there, so I am so glad you are feeling better.

    My advice: Ignore the nasties, know that they have nothing more exciting in their life than to know what happened in the life of someone they don't even know in person, and
    don't fuel the fire by posting this stuff. They are probably mentally unstable. Really and truly. I'm not even exaggerating.

    We all love reading you and support you!

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  30. Dear A-M,
    I apologise that I too am guilty of reading your lovely blog and and very rarely commenting... I am appalled that you have been subjected to anon's acid tongue.

    A friend once gave me a card with the following quote by Mother Teresa on it, I think you will appreciate it as much as I did.

    "People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.

    If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.

    If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed anyway.

    If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you. Be honest and sincere anyway.

    What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway.

    If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous. Be happy anyway.

    The good you do today, will often be forgotten. Do good anyway.

    Give the best you have, and it will never be enough. Give your best anyway.

    In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway."

    Angie
    xxxx

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  31. Good to see the support here. For every scum there are plenty of peeps who love and support you. Though it never ceases to amaze me how many people ask such personal and hurtful things of us when it isn't their business, either in "blog-land" or real life. Forget the cowardly desperates, your friends and family think you're awesome and that's all that matters :)

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  32. Your blog is so real. A priviledge to read each day (this might be my 3rd comment sorry). So many good things like bill for one. Impacted my life in a positive way, my kids wanted to go look for bill on a recent trip to bris!! Then I had to do a whole explanation on how we couldn't do that but we could find another way to help others. So how good is that, that's because of you A-M and you do not deserve abuse (that's what it is!!) thro this blog. Keep your chin up and delete!

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  33. Your blog is so real. A priviledge to read each day (this might be my 3rd comment sorry). So many good things like bill for one. Impacted my life in a positive way, my kids wanted to go look for bill on a recent trip to bris!! Then I had to do a whole explanation on how we couldn't do that but we could find another way to help others. So how good is that, that's because of you A-M and you do not deserve abuse (that's what it is!!) thro this blog. Keep your chin up and delete!

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  34. A-M........
    Be still. Feel your own energy....breathe. Stay calm. Know that you are true and genuine. What those people say and infer says so much about them and nothing about you. Don't waste your good and positive energy on them. Love your blog popping into my inbox every day. You inspire...I am in awe of your willingness to share. Be still. Breathe. Stay calm....just be you always. Fran x

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  35. Cripes A-M I think I live in a bit of a bubble because I have to say I was quite shocked to hear that such a thing happens. I'm a bit lost for words to be honest, surprised that a blog reader would feel they have any rights to someones life. I guess the way media melds its way into peoples everyday life sort of makes it an acceptable thing to do in this day and age, we accept that as a right. Perhaps this post will make all of us stop and think about "the line" and what a huge privilege it is to share even a little of anothers life through the wondrous tool of blogging. Its certainly given me much food for thought in regards to my own blog. Does even leaving this comment draw unwanted eyes towards my own?? (yikes)
    Keep on blogging on girl, I love to check in from time to time and see wasup in your wonderful world!
    alicia

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  36. I would like to say I don't believe it, but unfortunately I do. It has happened to me ~ nasty comments left on my blog. I did not publish, but it did make me stop blogging for a while. Then a wise lady told me to keep going and I am enjoying it more. However, after I joined FB and left a comment on another page I received a nasty phone call. Rattled me a little as my home is my business. Suffice to say I am keeping on going and I think you should do the same. If they do not have the courage to put their name to a comment they are small people. Forget them and be thankful for the gorgeous people you come into contact with. Hugs. Mx

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  37. Hi A-M

    I´m a girl from Sweden, I DON`T have to know EVERYTHNG about you, I would NEVER demand anything like that! And my mama always said. "If you can´t say anything nice, don´t say anythin at all"!
    I just LOVE your beautiful pitures and blog, I don´t always live a comment, but I´m "there",watching... ;-) hi hi!
    Have a great 2012, you and your boys! :-)

    Warm greeting all the way from Sweden!

    Anna-Maria
    (alias A-M too) ;-)

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  38. Pay no mind to the 'haters' ... I thoroughly enjoy everything you share and have no need to 'know more.' Happy New Year!

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  39. Dear A-M,
    I read a lot of blogs, but yours first. I love that it is a new day when we up top are still stuck one day back. And that's you....always ready for a new day and it's challenges. Always stopping to notice details on your run and make new friends. Always loving life with your great kids. Always gracious. Anyone not getting that strikes me as the person who was the school yard bully. Blog world/ Facebook makes it easy for them to hide, but even easier for us to hit delete. Just delete 'em ! And don't give them another thought.

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  40. There are sad people around who must lash out and spoil the day for those who just get on with it. It shows their mean spiritness that they must make derogatory comments and think should know all your private details.

    There are dozens of beautiful people out there who love to read your blog. The occasional nasty needs to be quickly deleted. They really aren't worth a second thought.

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  41. A-M I'm so glad that you've written this post. I've met you, I feel that I know you and to me you've always been genuine. You've always been real. And never once have I felt like you've misrepresented yourself, your life or your family.

    You've inspired me to love, care and enjoy what is around me each and every day. To hear that you're being personally attacked just disheartens and disappoints me.

    Remember A-M you have right and love on your side. Keep doing what you're doing ~ you are amazing!

    XO,
    Andrea

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  42. There there dear A-M - these comments are what the delete button was born for! We don't have to engage, don't have to ask, don't have to care: just let it slide off your back like a duck.

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  43. Well, here I am at 6am, Melbourne time, and there is something on your inspiring blog for me to read!! I don't know what it is exactly about you AM, but I read your blog every morning, without fail! People who try to be hurtful, let's be real, they do hurt us...however, you can control your side of things and delete their messages (can you spam them?). Someone very wise said to me once, "what someone thinks about me is none of my business". Although that's a bit glib, when people are pulling out the nasties, it really has helped me to move on when required. AM thank-you for your great blog!! I appreciate your honesty and vulnerability. Sometimes when we are living with purpose and finding fullfilment in the new situations that life creates, we can be tested by people who are unhappy, unfullfilled, jealous or so bored with a meaningless life that they need to create hurt and drama. Deep breath...move forward in love and gratitude. Your blessings and followers so greatly outnumber little cowards who post anonymous words.

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  44. Love your blog and have been reeding it for a couple of years. Love everything about it, you , your boys and the lizards ;)

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  45. Unfortunately, this is today's society-that we must all know everything about everyone.
    But that's wrong-we, as the general public, and your readers, don't need to know anymore than what you, AM, want us to know. Anything else is what I tell my son "Nunya."
    We need to put "nunya" into our lives more often.

    Hugs to you, AM. You made the correct choice.

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  46. Bloody hell A-M. Tell them to get knotted.
    You don't owe anyone anything.
    Lesley
    xx

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  47. Dear A-M,
    Live well, it's the best revenge,
    x

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  48. Oh gosh - I'm only just catching up this morning and have just read this blog. I absolutely echo what everyong else has said A-M. These people seriously need to take some happy pills! As one of your previous commenters has said - (it almost seems) society these days demands that you reveal absolutely everything about yourself. They like to refer to it as honesty - I call it "sticky beaking"! One of the recent life lessons I taught my daughter Kendall was "always keep that little bit of mystery surrounding youself." Be friendly (and honest!) by all means, but monitor your honesty. The friendship needs to be on "your terms." If they don't like it - too bad. As far as you are concerned - I would say you have the absolute right balance. Don't change a thing!
    On a brighter note - so pleased that my little "happy painting" is going to find a new home. It gives me so much joy to know that it makes you smile. Stay happy A-M. {{hugs}} ;)Sharyne

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  49. Boo & hiss to all the cowardly anonymous trolls! I agree with all of the lovely comments before mine but wanted you to know that you have my support too.

    The M-T quote written by Angie is a good one for all of us to keep reading from time to time. Keep smiling. x

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  50. I am amazed how many mean spirited, cruel people leave nasty, hurtful comments on peoples blogs, and then, to top it off, do it "ANON" !! I really think you should completely ignore them, laugh it off if you can, feel sorry for their smallness, and then hit the DELETE button ! I don't have my own blog, but I read and comment on many blogs (always nice comments !) and I can't believe how many blog owners have this same problem....No one is forcing anyone to read a blog. If you don't like it, or disagree, STAY AWAY, but , please keep those nasty comments to yourselves friends !!!

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  51. Don't even explain... Just hit delete! There are plenty of us who love reading your blog everyday and leave positive comments because they truely do care. ;-)

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  52. You're a darling and i would say that 99.9% of your readers love what you write and resonate with your daily blogging. I don't always get to visit so much these days but when I do i love to catch up with you so to speak. I guess ignore, ignore is the best strategy or block anon. comments. I am going to email you that house across the road too !! Mel xxx

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  53. Dear A-M, It has all been said and said so beautifully by your many loyal supporters.
    I love this quote by Eleanor Roosevelt....“Do what you feel in your heart to be right – for you’ll be criticized anyway. You’ll be damned if you do, and damned if you don’t.”
    Angex

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  54. I absolutely love reading your blog everyday- you are a source of inspiration, strength and happiness. You help me each day with your positive outlook.I love your positive wisdom that you SHARE- so many people never 'share' and like to see people struggle to make themself feel better, but just read your post from today (the guy in the glass) and you- lovely A-M are able to like what you see and respect who you see! These anonomys haters are just that- COWARDS! They are the people who have to put others down or try to bait others to make themselves feel better- but forget them, ignore them, you are so widely loved by soooo many readers and have a wealth of true and real friendship because of who you are- I bet these people lack real friends, this is obvious too as if you don't enjoy something why do it or in this case read it- they keep reading you because deep down they envy you and that icks them, so they they have to try to cut you down- but they won't really like who they 'see in the glass', if they looked - so forget these ignorant, petty , uneducated people, keep doing what makes your heart sing, keep loving your 2 beautiful sons who you are doing an amazing job of raising, keep inspiring and being inspired by gorgeous homes (please keep sharing these too- as I LOVE your style and taste) and please forget those anonymus cowards- leave them to their own miserable lives and when you get one of their comments- just remember they must really like what you do or they wouldn' keep reading you- they also really must like you as they take their 'precious time' to comment, feel sorry for them- they don't obviously feel the happiness you feel in your life!I don't often reply because I never know if someone is interested in what I have to say- but I felt passionately about your post. You help me personally everyday, you don't know how much- but you do- I feel your positive energy. I too have sons (3 of them) who I absolutely love with all my heart and more- just as you do with your gorgeous sons and I feel an affinity with you as a mumma, and I absolutely love real estate.You were my very first blog I came to read because of your gorgeous home beautiful edition that featured your stunning home, and yours is the one that brings pure joy every day! Keep blogging - you are a beautiful soul and a wonderful mumma and forget those others!!! Sending you love and xxxx and oooo's

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  55. I'm pretty lucky in that I've been blogging for five or six years and have never had a truly nasty "troll" commenter - I obviously don't inspire much jealousy, LOL. But I have had some mean-spirited or misguided comments from those who apparently think they "know" me and all about me. Pfft.

    The thing about blogging is that we choose what we share with our readers. There is no obligation to share everything about your life - and seriously, some bloggers horrify me with their over-sharing. O_O Some things really should be kept private.

    I think that you have such a large number of regular readers because your positivity attracts people. Unfortunately there are a few people wallowing in the shallow end of the gene pool who thrive on other people's dramas and misfortunes. I suspect that their own lives are miserable or unsatisfying, which makes them jealous of any kind of success or happiness and so they try to drag others down to their level.

    One thing I've learned: When people make nasty assumptions about you, it's usually not about you at all. Rather it's all about THEM and their feelings.

    It's hard to ignore them or to not take their snide comments personally, but really? They are not worth a moment of your attention, and certainly not worth any worry or anxiety.

    OR... you could simply publish all the nasty comments in a post and let your readers loose on them. ;o)

    Keep doing what you do, A-M. It's why your readers love you. x

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  56. If not for 'Karen-gate 2012' I probably wouldn't have commented on this post. I would have said to myself, 'That's great', had a moment of gratitude on your behalf and then moved on. Why? Because, I, like you, have faith that everything will sort itself out, with or without my intervention.

    However, I am compelled to comment after an hour of mulling over Karen's comment. Does she realise that her 'views' have further reaching consequences? I live in a master planned estate in Brisbane, and am very happy to do so. In fact, I love it. (Note: Not North Lakes, but I quite like North Lakes and was not aware that it was held in such disregard!). Her comments offend others than just whom they were aimed at as well as offending them because she has offended/upset the initial person. I am annoyed with her, and I don't even know her.

    One of my goals this year is to not let other people get to me the way they do. Hence, I am writing this to get it out of my system and then will try to walk away and forget that she ever wrote what she wrote or why she wrote it.

    Sorry, A-M, this has ended up more about me than you, and feel free not to publish it, but I'm sure there is a lesson in this for us all.

    Thank you for sharing your daily life, good and bad. And, keep the faith!!!

    M
    xxo

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  57. Hi, I am a long time reader but up until now, a lurker! I love your blog and it is always my first read. I love your style, humor and honesty. I don't keep returning for any deeply personal stories although I do appreciate the pearls you do share. Sometimes we may wonder about the stories behind the stories just as we do about the person who serves us our daily coffee. And we certainly wouldn't dream of interrogating them!
    You are very inspiring for so many reasons, one of which is your dignified manner. It shines through your writing and it is to be congratulated and celebrated.

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  58. Dearest A-M, You are a lovely & generous lady who dares to share with Us. All I can say about anon. eejits is "Haters gonna hate". I know it must feel so personal when you read crap in the moment that you see it. But, don't let their vitriol affect you any longer than the moment it takes to delete. It really isn't personal to you - they are poor & trying to find power any way they can & they will move on to others. We all can only continue to keep our chins up & know where the good in life really lies: with you & the rest of us who appreciate you. Very best for 2012 from Nova
    Scotia & thank you.

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  59. oh that sux...how can people be so upfront!? it amazes me that if you dont have anything nice to say then dont say it at all! Ive been blogging for years now and am pretty lucky that i havnt had negative comments yet.
    i read your blog daily but dont comment much (time factor) and admit I was curious what happened, mostly because I was suprised you sold your beautiful house! but geesh...i would never demand answers from you!
    Goodluck with your move!

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  60. Well said A-M, i feel you deal & reveal things in your life with style & grace.
    if readers aren't willing to put a name to their comments then perhaps they shouldn't be entitled to comment at all & if its gossip they are after then they should stick to gossip magazines.
    Love your blog & your positive outlook!!

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  61. Hi A-M
    Just letting you know that I am a huge supporter of what you do. As Millie said, just delete their comments. I know you probably feel that it isn't fair to just publish the positive comments, but these people honestly don't deserve to have their thoughts shown in print. Don't give them that satisfaction and don't feel you have to offer an explanation to anyone. We are all with you.
    (PS: A small part of me hopes Katrina does track them down. Did I say that?)
    Sharyn x

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  62. I just love the last paragraph. Such an awesome thing to point out. Why should you spill the beans of your private life when they can't even leave their names. Do what it right for you and your family. That is all that counts.

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  63. You only have to write what YOU want to write! You are the blog author and they don't have to read! I love blogs, because it lets you get a peek into people's lives and you get to visit other countries and states and you get to "know" people you wouldn't otherwise. But that doesn't mean that as a blogger, I'm going to share every detail! Hang in there and just delete the nasty stuff!

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  64. Just realised my comment should have been on the previous post RE: finding a new house! Sorry. M x

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  65. Dear A-M,

    What bullies fear most is exposure of their inadequacy and being called publicly to account for their behavior and its consequences.

    Maybe it is time.... From the looks of it, I'm sure the comments alone from this post show our support of you!

    Rachael.

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  66. Well done, well said. It's exactly that small mindedness that's holding me back from blogging however your the inspiration that keeps me blogging. Keep doing what you do best because you are good it and that is how you will get the better of those awful people who I believe are jealous of your blog, your life and your ability to be able to chat to the lovely homeless man in the park. I think your great and so do the other 65 people before me who have taken the time to leave you a lovely comment. Chin up AM and keep house hunting the future's bright x

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  67. These trolls are so spineless they don't even leave their names. Personally, I say, if you can't own what you say you have no right to say it. I know you and I know that you speak your truth. You are a beautiful person inside and out and you should never have to second guess that.

    Pay these trolls no heed and just keep doing what you do. You make so many people happy. xxxxxx

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  68. Delete. Delete. Delete. Trolls begone!
    A-M we love you. I've been reading your blog for a few months now and it's become the one I leave until last. Like a special treat. A positive start to the day. Don't change.

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  69. Blogging takes heaps of energy! I really admire you & your beautifully written & very thoughtful posts. Boohoo to the rude & mean spirited anonymous authors. KP

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  70. A-M,
    I read your blog regularly but I don't think I've ever commented (very rude - sorry!). I love your positivity and also appreciate the way you are honest and don't pretend you live in a perfect bubble whilst at the same time (from your positive blog posts) it seems like you choose to see the good things in life, like a glass-half-full attitude. It is really sad to hear you've had some nasty readers but I hope you keep blogging and ignore them. I showed my husband your blog once and was telling him what a great Mum you seem to be - I should have told you!! Nobody has a right to demand personal details of you, it is a privilege to even be able to read your blog at all and that you even share anything of your life is generous! If they persist, maybe get the ISP to track them. Otherwise, know many of us are quietly reading your daily updates and enjoying your love for life. Hope your move goes well - I will miss the lovely photos of the river that you take! It looks like a special place to live.
    Helen

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  71. It is your life and your blog, so you have the right to share whatever you do or do not want to. It's a simple as that really. I love your blog and enjoy reading it every day, although I don't always comment! Ignore the detractors as there will always be people like that out there. As my grandmother used to say "what Peter says about Paul says more about Peter than Paul". Have a lovely day and just delete the nasties from now on without even reading them! K x

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  72. Wow, some people really need to take a look in the mirror. Just because you read a blog doesn't mean you are entitled to information. You should feel darn lucky you get the info you do.

    Sorry you have received some nasty comments AM. Keep on being you. I like the realism that you bring to the world. Homeless people exist, but that doesn't mean they aren't nice people. I thoroughly enjoy reading about Bill and James, and think that it is lovely that you encourage your boys to not turn a blind eye to homelessness

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  73. Dear A-M,
    There is no doubt that you are overflowing with style and grace, love and compassion.

    Please continue to live YOUR life to the full, enjoy every minute as you do.

    By posting negative comments the so-called "trolls" only attract further negativity into their own lives.

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  74. Up until very recently I had someone in my life who quite possibly could have been one of your 'haters'. Although she would call it 'her opinion'. Looking for the reasons why a blogger is posting and picking apart what they are posting. Then she started on me....
    It's so 'lightening' to no longer have someone like that judging and critisizing everyone. Defniately hit the delete button and don't let their bitterness envelope you.
    Keep smiling :)

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  75. Dear A-M
    What you share with us all us a privilege..thank you!
    Love Fiona

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  76. A-M did I blink and miss the fact that we are back in the 6th grade and "I won't be your friend unless you tell me". I can't believe people can be so cruel and hurtful. Yours (and Katrina's) are the first blogs I check each time and believe me, I enjoy reading about your ups and downs (it shows we all have them). Continue on as is, and don't let them get to you.

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  77. Dear A-M,

    I think you are lovely and courageous. That is why I follow your blog!

    Just feel sorry for those nasty cowards with nothing better to do with their lives. Keep up the sunshine and roses :)

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  78. Dear A-M,
    Thank you for all that you share with us, your inspirations, your ideas, your photos, your energy - your love of life, family, & those around you. Your open honesty and forthrightness are refreshing & rewarding.
    Above all, you truly are an inspiration to the rest of us.
    Catherine.

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  79. A-M i cannot believe some people are so cruel and feel as though others owe them. You DO NOT OWE ANYONE any details that you would not like to reveal.

    I don't know you personally, but each and every time I read your blog, I walk away feeling so inspired and on some occassions have a few tears. Some heartfelt sorrow for you and others of such kindness from your heart.

    You are an amazing woman and mum, and you are definately a perfect role model for your boys.

    Keep your head held high with strength and confidence because for those few nasty ppl out there (Karen Rogers), there are so many more people who appreciate you for you!!!!!!!!

    Thinking of you.

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  80. You know my views on anon hate comments. I reveal less than some bloggers and maybe more than most. I never show faces or exteriors of homes. I wish these people would channel their energy into something productive and creative don't you?

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  81. Love that last paragraph, well said. At the end of the day it all comes down to envy. It can make people horrible for no reason at all. Keep fighting the good fight. Lots of love..Rachaelxx

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  82. Why is it the best bloggers receive scathing remarks from idiots who remain anonymous? Hopefully AM you won't take some jackass to heart. Easier said than done I know. I wonder if the same jackass sent Rhoda a similar message. It's things like this that prove why no blogger wants to share any of their personal information. We followers are peeps that are faceless and not known to you. Why should they care and why would you want to share intimate details of that sort? Whoever anonymous is needs a big reality check!

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  83. I think you said it all when you said you respect the boys father. And the right to privacy. The world has just gotten too comfortable in knowing the details of other peoples lives. Perhaps it is reality TV or loose morals, but honesty and integrity seem to have fallen by the wayside. There's a lot to be said for being private. One day your boys will read your blog and I am sure they would rather you don;t dish the goods on it. The personal things you don;t want to share are none of any bodies bloody business. No one has the right to attack you for being private and respectful.

    Chania

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Thanks for stopping by and taking the time to leave me a comment. I love hearing from you. A-M xx